Stuck

Dear Diary,

So I am in a relationship with this guy, and it has been four months (so everything is still pretty new). At first, thing were going really good. We spent lot of time with each other, we traveled, and we even met each others family (which both of our families love us together). We always talk about our furture together and how we hope to get married. It used to make me so happy. But Lately, it feels like things are going downhill. I haven’t been as happy lately because I feel like all we do is argue. I don’t know what changed. Well, I do know what changed, but I thought he would understand since I am still in school and he is not.

Ever since school started I’ve been more busy with assignments, homework, etc.. My boyfriend loves spending time with me and being around me which is lovely because you don’t come across men like that these days. But like I was saying, I’ve been more busy and I haven’t been able to hang out with him as much as he wants (this is what has caused the arguements). I thought he would’ve understood because he was in school not to long ago, but he doesn’t. He feels like since everything is online, why can’t he be over while I’m doing my work. To myself I am thinking, well maybe because I wouldn’t be able to concentrate, which I have told him this, but he still won’t let up. Sometimes I feel like he is suffoating me with quality time. You have to be able to spend time apart right ? Isn’t that healthy? I don’t know I just don’t feel the same anymore because with all of our arguements, he has made me feel like I don’t make time for him. Which I do, it’s just not as much as he wants. Everyday I am praying and asking God what should my next steps be because I feel like he has shown me a couple of red flags. There has been more things that has happened but I’m not going to explain them here. I’m just caught up because you take time to grow and get closer with someone, and now it feels like stuff is going down the drain. Don’t get me wrong, he is a very great boyfriend and he has done so much for me, I just don’t know what to do … I hate feeling like I am stuck. I told him that I am going to do some thinking about what I want to do in regards to our relationship and when I tell yall, he has said some things that makes me what to stick it through. But the other half of me is telling me to take a break until after I graduate. Idk I just pray I make the right decision because half of me still wants the relationship and half of me doesn’t… Pray for me please…